2008 Woodie Awards
Holt School Introduces New Majors/Classes
Jennifer Walchok
Issue date: 4/1/05 Section: Holt News
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Big news has just been released from the Hamilton Holt school: new courses and majors have been designed to increase the scope of offerings for undergraduates this fall. The new changes conform to the wide diversity of the student body and aim to provide students with the real world skills needed after college.
One of the most popular new majors starting this fall is 'Home Economics' for female students, also known as the MRS degree. The Holt school created this major to encourage female students to reach their full potential as homemakers. This major focuses on the art of finding a sugar daddy, the correct way to windex windows, dealing with your spoiled children and your husband's pesky mistress, all while looking pretty. Communications professor, Dr. Sue Easton, is excited about the changes, "If this major was offered when I was an undergraduate student I never would have worked so hard and gained my PhD... I would have been better able to find a man to take care of me."
There are also many other great classes to look forward to such as a new expressive art class entitled 'Intro to Pornography Choreography' with a $35.00 adult materials handling fee. This class focuses on the importance of stage presence and body positioning, as well as advanced lighting techniques involved in the adult film industry. Fellow Holt student William Long '07 comments on this new course, "This class will be great: I have been hoping the Holt school would finally add a class to both improve my home movie collection and increase the quality of my solo-sex life."
Another marketing class has also been added to the schedule called Corporate Deception - Topic: College Textbooks. With this course you too can make a billion dollars a year by ripping off needy students. Business minors can also learn about today's competitive corporate culture in another new course entitled 'Effective Networking Techinques.' This class teaches students how to lie, cheat, backstab and sleep your way to the top.
One of the most popular new majors starting this fall is 'Home Economics' for female students, also known as the MRS degree. The Holt school created this major to encourage female students to reach their full potential as homemakers. This major focuses on the art of finding a sugar daddy, the correct way to windex windows, dealing with your spoiled children and your husband's pesky mistress, all while looking pretty. Communications professor, Dr. Sue Easton, is excited about the changes, "If this major was offered when I was an undergraduate student I never would have worked so hard and gained my PhD... I would have been better able to find a man to take care of me."
There are also many other great classes to look forward to such as a new expressive art class entitled 'Intro to Pornography Choreography' with a $35.00 adult materials handling fee. This class focuses on the importance of stage presence and body positioning, as well as advanced lighting techniques involved in the adult film industry. Fellow Holt student William Long '07 comments on this new course, "This class will be great: I have been hoping the Holt school would finally add a class to both improve my home movie collection and increase the quality of my solo-sex life."
Another marketing class has also been added to the schedule called Corporate Deception - Topic: College Textbooks. With this course you too can make a billion dollars a year by ripping off needy students. Business minors can also learn about today's competitive corporate culture in another new course entitled 'Effective Networking Techinques.' This class teaches students how to lie, cheat, backstab and sleep your way to the top.