The Sandspur

Issue date: 4/4/08 Section: News

On Tuesday, April 1st a large gathering of maniacal Hannah Montana fans laid siege to the Mills building, where free tickets had been given away to her upcoming on campus concert. Three were killed, ten were hospitalized and thirteen were incarcerated.

The riot broke out after a campus wide email was sent announcing the concert and the ticket give away. Word spread like wildfire through Rollins and set ablaze the hopes and dreams of millions in the Central Florida area.

A high ranking official for All Campus events was reached but wished to remain anonymous due to the sensitive legal ramifications of the bloodbath. "That was fucked up, I mean we are in some deep shit here," the official said, "I can't believe no one saw this coming, I can barely look at myself in the mirror knowing I had a hand in this carnage."

Ten minutes after sending the email, the tickets had been claimed and a large gathering formed on Mills lawn as well as in front of the campus center.

The lucky recipients of the tickets were met by the bloodthirsty hands of the mob, and their elation about seeing the adolescent star quickly turned to fear.

"I can't believe I survived," said Evie Lyras, a sophomore in Chi Omega and one of the few who left the fracas with her original ticket, "I have seen some pretty sick shit because I'm from Memphis, but this was beyond."

Initial violence towards the ticket holders escalated quickly and the rage was soon focused on the organizers of the event. Students picked up stones from the Walk of Fame and heaved them through the barricaded windows of the Mills Building.

Soon after, a fire broke out in the mail room where students were trapped because of a bottle neck going up the stairs to the foyer of the building. Sophomore Andrew McLean witnessed the downstairs devastation firsthand saying "The inferno was madness.
I was at the bottom of the stairs, so when they collapsed into a burning pile of despair, I was able to fight through the crowd."

One of the bodies identified was that of senior Alex Radman, who was trampled to death. He was at the bottom of the staircase that leads to the Writing Center when a flood of bodies propelled by their downward momentum overwhelmed him. "I'll miss him," said Erica Leas, his housemate, "but when I was at the morgue identifying the body, I reached in his jeans and found ticket, so he went down for a cause."

Almost immediately, the Winter Park police were contacted, but their riot squad arrived too late. Many students remembered some of the riot squad members that terrorized the campus one year ago during Alpha Tau Omega's graffiti party. An anonymous Winter Park policeman was quoted saying "I love coming to Rollins whether it be to drag someone's cold clammy alcohol poisoned body out of McKean or to just use some excessive brute force in a riot situation. Either way, I'm probably gonna ruin some rich kid's day."

When accosted in person for comment, President Duncan ran back into his mansion with a large bag over his shoulder, leading the reporter to believe that the disaster was all a front to assure safe transportation of The Fox.

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