After tirelessly listening to the female student body obsess over ABC’s hit show, The Bachelorette, Rollins has decided to create their own reality TV-based relationship competition. Airing on FOX Media April 10, Jamie Ernst ‘19 will star as the most eligible bachelorette at Rollins College.
With glistening blonde hair, daggering blue eyes, and a flawless GPA, Ernst is deemed quite the catch, a catch that, starting next week, many men will fish for.
“I am so honored to be selected and really hope I will be able to find my soulmate,” said Ernst.
Ernst will have the pleasure of spending 10 weeks with 10 eligible Rollins bachelors. The process of choosing the bachelors was pretty competitive, with many of the men offering quite the sacrifice. “I would give up hot sauce and all spicy/seasoned food for her!!” said Damian Clarke ‘19.
George New ‘19 chimed in to say, “She never fails to shine in an awkward situation. One time when a party went dead. She just started doing the worm. In the middle of a dirty college kitchen. She has guts. Grit. And the determination I like to see in my women.”
Ernst was selected out of a pool of nearly 1,000 female students. Other students agree on the choice, with Tori Whalen ‘19, saying, “There was barely any competition to begin with. Jamie was the obvious choice right from the start.”
Which lucky lad will win over her bright smile and cynical humor? Tune in April 10 at 9 p.m. to find out.
April Fools!! The content in this article is meant to be read in satire and does not represent the opinions of The Sandspur, its staff, or Rollins College.